Ass Kickers United 👊

I’m on home gym team for lot of reasons. One big reason is avoiding the Ass Kickers United. Ass Kickers United is like if the gang from "Always Sunny in Philadelphia" decided to do CrossFit, but with even less common sense and more ego.

Most CrossFit gyms are a melting pot of sweat, grunts, and the occasional misplaced kettlebell. Classes are scheduled tighter than Mac's shirts in season 7. Now, in this fitness frenzy, you have a group of over-achievers who think the 'Cross' in CrossFit stands for 'Crossing into your personal space.'

They're like the Nightman and Dayman combo of gym etiquette – nonexistent. They swoop in during classes, snatching equipment like Frank Reynolds with sausages. Need a dumbbell? Too bad, they've hoarded them like Charlie hoards cheese. Looking for space to do your burpees? Forget it. They've marked their territory wider than Dennis' ego and they are not even participating in the scheduled class. They act like open gym is ALWAYS open.

You know who they are if you’ve been to any CrossFit or functional fitness type of gym. They may even lurk in globo gyms. They are the Ass Kickers United! They have uncanny ability to turn a one-hour workout into an all-day gym occupation while encroaching on others personal space.

For most of us, we just want to get in, work out, and get out – simple, right? But no, every visit becomes an episode of "Survivor: Gym Edition” when hte Ass Kickers United are present. You're not just battling the weights; you're up against the Ass Kickers United and their quest to be the alpha of the regular joe CrossFit gym.

It's like they're trying to start their own fitness cult, where the only rule is: 'Thou shalt not let others work out in peace.' They've got more drama than a "Real Housewives" reunion and enough intensity to power the Always Sunny gang's Paddy's Pub for a week.

In the end, you realize, this isn't just a gym. It's a sitcom, and you're the sensible character surrounded by a cast of absurdly muscular cavemen and women that can only grunt when trying to communicate.

Get your own home gym set up. The only reason you should be going to a CrossFit gym long-term is to see the Ass Kickers United like an episode of National Geographic, not just for the workouts. For real though, you're paying for the best live entertainment in town.

Who needs Netflix when you've got real-time drama unfolding right in front of your very own eyes? Every gym session is an episode filled with drama, comedy, and Ass Kickers Come with your workout gear and, most importantly, your popcorn. Because let's be real, the only heavy lifting you're really interested in is lifting that popcorn to your mouth as you watch the daily soap opera of the gym unfold.

When you go to a gym like this, your not just a gym member; you're a live audience. Forget about PRs and WODs; these are not just a place to get fit; it's your personal comedy club where the membership fee is the price of admission.

Daily Mindset